Late-night television hosts this week criticized the demolition of a historic section of the White House and the business backers of a $300 million luxury hall construction.
The 'Late Night' Host
On a recent episode of his show, Seth Meyers voiced shock over the president's initiative to construct a opulent ballroom. “It would be bad enough if his main focus was just building a gilded vanity project for himself, but it’s even more concerning,” he stated. “Because to accomplish it, he’s tearing down a historically significant and beloved piece of property.”
The structure in question is the entire East Wing of the presidential residence, which has stood for more than a century. He's demolishing the entire East Wing to build his stupid ballroom. Just consider this,” Meyers marveled. “This is like a follow-up to a home renovation show called Fucked Upper.”
Unsurprisingly, the president misled about the initiative.” When he first announced it no destruction and claimed it “won’t interfere with the existing structure” because it would be “adjacent without contact”.
In essence, he vowed to handle it similarly to his personal relationships,” Meyers joked.
The president claimed the design evolved following extensive research with some of the best architects in the world”.
Is that so? Who was the designer you consulted, Godzilla?” Meyers retorted.
Criticism emerged quickly, if ineffective. The National Trust for Historic Preservation sent a letter Trump stating that the addition would overwhelm the existing building and asked him to pause construction until a review could occur. “One, I couldn’t agree more with the preservation society,” Meyers commented. “And two, best wishes with that appeal.”
“This couldn’t be any more of a bait and switch,” he added. “Trump got elected by claiming he was going to improve living costs for hardworking Americans, and currently he's destroying the White House to construct for himself a lavish personal venue.”
The 'Late Show' Host
“As of this morning the eastern section resembled a cooked poultry your dog got into,” said Stephen Colbert on the Late Show. “It's disturbing to witness, I understand that, and you know the administration knows that,” because on that day, security personnel blocked entry to the Ellipse park where journalists had been capturing images of the demolition.
“Well that makes sense – if none of it is on camera, they can just claim the East Wing hanged itself in prison,” Colbert joked.
He highlighted that it was “a lot of history being torn down”, as the East Wing was built in 1902 and had been the base for first ladies since the Carter administration. “Actually, the former first lady was in the eastern part, and I certainly hope they got her out because she’s frequently confused with a decorative lighting fixture,” Colbert joked over an image of her more unusual ensembles.
Trump has funded the “ball-doggle” with money from eager businesses including major tech and entertainment firms. “And Trump needs all the cash he can get,” said Colbert, as the estimated cost has already increased from $250 million to over $300m, for a 90,000 sq-ft construction, larger than the current residence itself. “It's comparable to a sports pitch,” Colbert observed. “So remember, corporations, as you bribe the president: no hands.”
The Daily Show
And on the comedy program, a correspondent detailed the rapid progression of the initiative from idea to action. “Initially, he promised that it would be separate from the current building and he wouldn’t touch the eastern section. That the work would remain non-intrusive,” he summarized.
“Then this week, there was a minor change to the plan when Trump ripped open the side of the East Wing like it had a collectible toy inside.”
Within days, the entire East Wing was gone. “This is all happening so fast,” he said. “He has spent 15 years to give us a medical reform, but in 3.5 days he’s demolished half the White House. The president, assure us this will be aesthetically pleasing …”
Not quite – according to a miniature display shown to officials, the new hall will overshadow the current White House. “It looks like one of those crabs with the big arms, right?” Kosta chuckled. “In other words, I don’t know a lot about architecture. But I do know a thing or two about overcompensating for a small penis.”
